Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
