well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Randomize