Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
she told me i tasted like america
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
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