Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
