I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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