I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
After last night, I could never be a politician.
it was like eating out sand paper
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize