Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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