and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
