I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
