Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize