mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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