guys are only as good as the porn they watch
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
you never un-have a 4some
Randomize
