then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Randomize
