I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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