I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
