Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize