My room smells like vodka and shame
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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