she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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