you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
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