My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
