So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Someone signed my nipple.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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