Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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