Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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