Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.