Non-Jews are for practice
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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