You work out of a Hotel?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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