Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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