By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Dicks are not precious.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
