Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
