Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
