you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
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