i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
