i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
