I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
