he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
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He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
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I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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