go do what you do best...puke behind churches
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I have aggressive nipples.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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