We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
