Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
10+ Incredible Tumblr Stories That Will Leave You Shook
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes