You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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