Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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