You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
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