I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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