found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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