The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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