i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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