Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
