Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
