Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
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