He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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