i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
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