let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Randomize
